Hidden Sorrows

i woke up from road construction outside at 7 in the morning and im so fuckING PISSEd
knowing me and my insomnia, i wont be able to go back to sleep nyeh

aNYWAYS

long time no art
OTL
something always ended up coming up. one thing or another. first school, then severe depression and anxiety, and then i got sick with like 4 different illnesses. i managed to finish last night (finally) when i still had like 2 illnesses to take care of, but i got fucking tired of not being productive in my art so.. im still sick with the 2 illnesses, but im getting better. i can feel it.
why is my immune system so weak i always get multiple illnesses at once ;-;
and frequently at that

anyways
dolly is someone who doesnt show a lot of emotions, except anger. (if shes giving you her infamous death glare fuckinG RUN) meaning she practically doesnt smile or cry. smiling being even more rare. But.. she's been through enough in her life, and still is everyday, as well as constantly battling of whats right and whats wrong.... She actually shows some sadness on her face if she just started thinking about it all.
and sometimes on her missions, she actually has this face too, because some are just too cruel for her to do, but she still has to do them nevertheless.
so she is filled a tragic past, where some of it is still ongoing, as well as a massive amount of regrets.
but she tries her best to not let it get to her on her daily life, but sometimes.. the sadness just slips out, like shown in the picture.

this is probably the first time ive actually taken soft shading more seriously in a LONG time
and since the bg/fg covered up like half of my efforts on coloring dolly, which im more proud of than the bg itself, here she is without a bg and effects: 

i feel like i have more to say but im shaking again from my illness so..

Dolly (c) me
Art (c) me
Drawn entirely in Paint Tool SAI